Dream you’re watching Liza wrap up a sold-out concert at Carnegie Hall. Dream of a powerhouse performance of New York, New York. Dream there’s a post-show party at the Mocambo. Dream the Mocambo didn’t close down back in 1958. Dream Liza asks you for a ride. Dream Liza can’t drive on account of her two hip replacements make it difficult. Dream telling Liza you’d be honored to give her a lift. Dream owning a red convertible. Dream your husband getting behind the wheel because he says you drive like an old lady. Dream you don’t care what he says. Not tonight. Dream that means you get to ride in the back seat with Liza Minnelli exclamation point. Dream the route to the Mocambo snakes through the scenic high deserts of the American Southwest. Dream it’s late at night – late at night in the scenic high deserts of the American Southwest where the only thing visible to you is the unpaved road ahead, illuminated by headlights. Like the opening credits to Lost Highway. Dream Liza sticking her head out the window to feel the wind whip through her jet-black hair. Dream neither of you is wearing safety belts. Dream how great it is to be in the presence of a bona fide show biz legend like Liza. Dream she’s regaling you with funny stories about Michael York and Martin Scorsese and Chita Rivera and Peter Allen and the Pet Shop Boys. Dream she repeatedly refers to her mother as Judy Garland. Dream that’s sort of weird, but OK. Doesn’t matter. You’re with Liza Minnelli exclamation point. Dream nothing else in the universe matters. As far as you’re concerned, this is the first point in the history of mankind that anything has ever mattered. Including Jesus. Dream Liza climbs halfway out the sunroof. Dream this is a convertible with a sunroof. Dream Liza beating on the roof of the car with bejeweled hands like it’s a bongo drum. Dream Liza belting out Maybe This Time. Dream Liza just radiates pure joy. Dream Liza is pure joy in human form. Dream you want to be like Liza. Dream you want to be Liza. Dream Liza hanging out the car window like some daredevil circus act. Dream the only things keeping Liza from flying off into the high desert night are the heels of her black patent leather boots hooked around the car door handle. Dream you’re starting to worry. Dream that’s not how a septuagenarian with two hip replacements should comport herself. Dream Liza could get hurt. Dream there might just possibly be such a thing as too much pure joy. Dream the car suddenly swerves off to one side and Liza goes airborne like balloons escaping a clumsy child. Dream you shout at your husband to stop the car stop the car exclamation point exclamation point. Dream what a nightmare. Dream having to explain Liza’s accidental death to a 9-1-1 dispatcher or the police or the folks awaiting her arrival at the Mocambo or reporters from People magazine or her legion of devoted gay superfans encircling the entertain-o-sphere. Dream how you’ll never go down in history as a poet now unless it’s as the poet who was with Liza when she met her tragic demise. Dream your husband hits the brakes just as you spot Liza climbing out of a ditch, covered in dust and gravel, smiling, laughing, exuberant, singing Liza with a Z at the top of her lungs. Dream she’s Liza Minnelli exclamation point and that woman’s a goddam survivor.
Edward Thomas-Herrera is a native of Houston, Texas where he attended Rice University and discovered boys, alcohol, and Expressionism – not necessarily in that order. Later, he moved to Chicago, Illinois where he discovered poetry and playwriting. Edward has a very long resumé of stage credits with which he refuses to bore you, but he’s happy to inform you that his poetry has appeared in Compressed, Tofu Ink Arts Press, Beaver Magazine, and The Account. (Photo credit: Phil Dembinski)
Lost Balloon 